Wednesday, September 21, 2016

53 Days of Marriage


My first post. Why start at 53 days? Because I like to be different. No, actually this is just the first day I’ve had time to write. And it's the last day of summer '16! There’s an 18-month-old little bean sitting next to me (whom I nanny) in her small plaid chair reading a princess book upside down as well—we just began having quiet time together that’ll last maybe 30 more seconds.

To begin, let me just say that I have loved being married 53 days, and I didn’t know I would love it this much.

Jump back now 53 days before marriage and I was an anxiety-driven mess dreading wedding planning/ being the bride and not being able to hide in the corner, wondering how life is going to change, what my new struggles will be, what my alone time will look like, how my friendships will change, and how on Earth am I going to be a wife?! The list went on adding up to the fact that I wasn’t trusting God is good and that He is for me. This I found is the root of all of my anxiety—again, not trusting that GOD IS GOOD and HE IS FOR ME.

There were some bumps along the way, but I would not change a single thing about my wedding day. I thought eloping was the best option—I was wrong. That’s a whole other post in itself.

Ben & I went to Northern California for 2 weeks right after we got married and it was incredible. I actually get emotional thinking about it because I wish we were back in our little cabin, sitting by the fire, doing a puzzle, and dipping Oreos in coffee. I was a little worried about spending 2 straight weeks with my new husband who I had never spent that much time with before. I am a strong introvert and could spend 2 weeks by myself perfectly satisfied. And by "by myself" I mean with a few books surrounded by nature. BUT there was not a single moment that I wished I could just be left alone. Ben is truly my best friend and I was so excited to wake up everyday and adventure with him. I believe we have a lot to owe to our long distance relationship of Face Timing for hours and not having any physical touch. But that’s also a whole other post.

Coming home from Cali was a little tough to transition back into real life, but we got the hang of it. Ben went back to work and I went back to class, but this time being married! Being a student wife is a lot better than I thought as well. I procrastinate a lot less often because I want to spend time with Ben when he gets home. I think I pretty much prepared myself for every worst possible situation, yet none of them have even came close to being true. That’s pretty typical in my world.

Tuesday night is date night, which I love because I get home at 6 and don’t want to do anything but chill. Last night Ben brought home flowers, we ate delicious homemade chili (recipe here) and cornbread (recipe here), had a glass of red wine, talked about consumer issues in American (short film here), and watched Prison Break. I have a love hate relationship with PB…it’s too tense, but I want to know what’s going to happen next. Our date nights also usually end up at Cava—we’re about that high-class life obviously.

Wednesday Ben plays basketball with some guys at our church, and I have a night to myself. Thursday we have small group with an awesome group of young married couples—3 are prego, which is super exciting. (No, Ben and I don’t plan on any kids for a few years). And the rest of our days are spontaneous.

The two biggest changes most likely came from me: going from eating meat every meal to attempting to become vegan because it breaks my heart how we're treating this beautiful planet, and changing my major from elementary education to family science. All good things. I could write 5 pages, but I wont.

Thanks for caring up to this point. If I could have you take anything out of this life update it is that God truly is good and He truly is for you. He is worthy of your trust my friend. And if you are ever doubting that, then just communicate with Him. Tell Him you don’t trust Him and admit you need help. His grace is abundant and I promise He hears you. There’s a whole book on it.

Until the next random day.

Love from Laura.